LivingAlmostLarge's Personal Finance Blog

I have to admit I like the fact Paul Ryan admits his hesitation for taking on the speaker of the house job is his family. That he reluctant to give up weekend family time. That he feels time is short. He gets it.

What I don't get is how he could vote against paid family leave for government workers and in general be against paid family leave for all workers if he values family? If his family is important to him, isn't our families important to us?

I am also impressed recently that Microsoft and Google have changed their paid maternity leave. I have met people who adored the paid 20 weeks of leave Microsoft had and now with the 1 year paid leave every woman I've talked to is EXCITED and feels empowered. The idea that a company understands picking between work and family is HARD.

And the truth is Paul Ryan is privileged. That he gets to tell the republican party his family is important and not lose his job. That he can afford to fly back and forth and see his family every weekend.

When I had my first I was back in 12 weeks to finish up work. I worked another 12 weeks before staying home permanently and because of it I was under tremendous pressure with childcare. I used temporary measures and family (my mom and MIL) came back and forth to help. I worked nights while my DH worked days because we knew it was temporary and I couldn't find a daycare for short term. But my 12 weeks were unpaid and I was GRATEFUL to even get that. I had met during my time off women who were going back after 6 or 8 weeks. More than a few quit rather than go back. One teacher went back after 4 weeks because she needed the money.

I didn't think it fair then and I don't think it's fair now. I would say about 20% of the women I met had paid leave and 80% had unpaid. But the 80% were just happy to have anything and those who were paid were thrilled even more.

Can we change our policy? You know the Canadian elections just occurred and they voted into a majority the liberal party. I am curious what will happen. As of right now women and men get up to 1 year paid maternity and paternity leave. They are able to split it between parents or just one. It makes for happier workers I can say because everyone I've met whose got it has been thrilled.

And interesting side aspect is that it allows often new college graduates a chance to get experience because they often get hired on a 1 year contract while a person is on "family leave." It's how my friend Mrs D got her first job out of college and parlayed that into a full time position. Then when she moved she landed another 1 year contract and again parlayed that into a full time position. I wonder if this would help new college graduates in the US if they were able to land 1 year contract positions for "experience"?

I now wonder will Paul Ryan push for paid family leave since he's expressed his desire for his own family time? Does he get it now? Has having children changed him? Does it make him more sympathetic?

So this year after moving our premium for our 2010 Subaru Outback and 2006 Hyundai Sonata is $612 per 6 months or $1224 for 1 year. This is for full coverage on the subaru outback and liability only on the sonata. The breakdown is $345 for 6 months on the Subaru and $267 per 6 months on the Sonata. We are carrying the maximum coverage besides at $250k/500k/$100k and $500 deductible and $250k/$500k coverage on collision.

This is with terrible driving records such as 3 accidents on record at fault. And our premium for sure went up from last year because my DH had I believe 1 claim from being hit while parked, and 1 claim for an at fault accident. My DH is the one with all 3 accidents and all claims thus far.

Last year we paid for full coverage on both vehicles for 1 year $534 for the Subaru and $527 for the Sonata for 1 year for the $250/$500k/$100k limits and $500 deductible.

This year we pay $167 for renter's insurance and $200 for $1 million dollar in umbrella coverage. I priced out progressive, geico, aaa and no one else was close to in price for our cars/homes, driving record. I love Ameriprise.

I am curious if anyone else with Costco membership has priced out the auto and home and umbrella insurance and if they are with Ameriprise or have they gone with Geico or Progressive or someone else.

Everyone I've referred to Costco insurance has switched because it's been cheaper than what they had. So I'd like to know what companies can beat cost? I think that savings on the insurance alone more than makes up for the membership since you can get membership for $55/year.

I hear a lot of people saying costco isn't worth it. I have to save if you have a membership to costco have you checked out and priced compared at least the home, auto, and umbrella against what you currently have? Before giving up your costco membership or deciding against buying a membership I would definitely call and price out their insurance if it's available in the state you're in. I'm curious others save money.

We've had 3 auto accidents (my DH all of them) and the customer service has been fantastic. We've had 3 home water damage claims and the service again has been phenomenal. I recently claimed a windshield chip and they repaired it without a complaint immediately. When doing the repairs on our cars they got on it asap. My BIL totalled his car and he got paid out way more than he expected. Besides the follow up, call back, just the customer service overall is amazing.

Anyway I'm a huge fan of costco and even if we didn't live super close I'd still be a member. Previously we weren't that close to costco but I kept my membership for insurance. Now that it's one of our two main shopping stops.

Also if it matters they treat their employees great. They pay them a living wage and treat them very nicely. My cousin worked for costco corporate and the benefits are great and they worked and let her transfer stores. In hawaii most people stay employed over 20 years. So you are into supporting companies that care Costco is one I'm happy to spend my dollars supporting. And their return policy is amazing.

So our spending is getting more in line this month so far. We've spent $141 on gas. Probably another fill up for us both so we will be at $200 for the month. We've spent $45 on alcohol out of $50 budgeted. We've spent only $329 on groceries which seems low but we have another week. I am hoping to spend around $500, but we've been eating from the pantry and freezer a lot. Plus we've spent $103 on eating out so far this month. We still have to spend $28 on spooky spaghetti night fundraiser for the school next Thursday. We paid our electric and heat bill for $84.

I also used my discover cash back and got $120 in Land's end gift cards with 20% extra cash back. I have to admit I bought these canvas tote bags I've been lusting after for years. I always eyed the LL Bean bags with canvas tote with zipper in different sizes. But I thought spending $30-40 a bag too much. Well they had 30% off deal and my mom last time she visited expressed her desire for a new bag. I used the gift cards and bought her a black bag monogrammed, just like the one she has. And I bought myself three different sizes. I will definitely keep the medium size tote but I'm unsure if I want the large or x-large size. Has anyone seen these totes? I have multiple friends and have lusted after it for a long time but couldn't justify it. But I decided since I got the cash back plus the bonus cash back I'd take advantage. It cost me $5 OOP plus $100 cash back for the $125 worth of gift cards.

Ugh I also had to call discover and get another new credit card. What is going on? This is yet the third time, once in July, once in August there have been fraudulent charges from online orders. UGGH.

So a few weeks ago the VP of my DH's old company got fired. Well technically he "resigned" because of a difference in opinion with management. But from everyone there he was canned for being a A#&(!)#! He walked into the building and was walking out by noon.

What does that have anything to do with us? Well today there was a massive layoff at my DH's old company. 12% of people are being let go by December but they were being informed today.

So it might have been nice to get unemployment and severance. If he were chosen. But my DH said it's better to not be there. Right after layoffs it's depressing to see everyone laid off being the "walking wounded." They are working until December before the layoff officially kicks in and severance and unemployement are claimed.

What would we have done? I don't know. But right now the market is terrible to sell and moving mid year I would not have enjoyed. In some ways my DH feels he came out ahead getting to leave on his own terms.

He's a little worried for friends who are losing their jobs but at the same time maybe they'll be better off. Certainly we ended up in a place unemployed but cheaper and a much happy place. Plus instead of a old, drafty townhouse we couldn't heat, we're in a newer, single family that is very comfortably insulated!

But it is a pretty depressing day for many friends.

I'm very sad to hear so many bloggers are struggling with their parents health right now. It really puts into perspective what's important in life, well at least to me.

I've lived now half my life away from the island since leaving for college and I've moved around a bit. But the one constant since I left was going home at least 1x/year usually 2x/year. The draw was always my parents, grandparents, great-grandmother, and extended family. I can honestly say I missed out on many travel adventures because my DH and I spent a lot of money on seeing my family and his instead of going trips to Europe, Asia, etc. And granted the trips were cheaper than traveling since we usually saved on hotel costs. But the real cost was the lack of vacation time we had after we visited our families. We tried to travel off peak times so we could save and we still do. But we have spent a lot on visiting our families.

But this weekend we were invited to our neighbors housewarming party and I heard more than one person ask my DH what he does. His answer is nothing. He says I quit because he wanted to stay at home with the kids.

When we first came up with moving in March, my DH said besides being ready for a change, he decided that he was envious of the time I got as a stay at home mom with the kids. He felt he was missing out on so much by working full time and life was slipping by. He wanted some time to interact with the kids before they were too busy running away from us (already happening in kindergarten!)

So this weekend when people asked he told them he had no idea life with kids and not working was amazingly busy. It gave him a greater appreciation of what I've been doing with them. But also he's enjoying the interaction and having more than an hour in the morning, and a couple of hours are night. He's learning more about their habits and how to deal with them. He also said if it means working an extra year when he's 60 for a free year now at 37 he's ready and willing to do it.(probably closer to 2 years)

We made the move for many reasons. And I know deep down my DH and I were not as frugal as we could have been these past 15 years traveling, spending time with our families, etc. Further it might have made more sense for me to have been working when we had the kids to have saved every penny. And it's certainly not financially prudent to not be working now.

But I can't give anyone a hard time for choosing to spend money to see or spend time with family. I also can't give anyone a hard time choosing to cut back on working to spend more time with their kids when they are young. I guess I do believe in Mr Money Mustache and early retirement, but I also think perhaps the greater lesson is financial independence isn't only for early retirement. It's the opportunity to make the best financial decision you can for the place you are at. Working because you have to is different from working because you want to. And sometimes you work for the privilege of being able to take time off or see your family more.

My dad turns 85 this year. He will be spending Christmas in our "rental" home with our first tree for the kids. I hope we have our own home next year and he's able to spend it with us. This is a real treat and something I can't put a price tag on or express how lucky I am. My other hope is my grandmother who is 86 is able to make 1 trip to see us. Because of their ages I've always done trips to see them since neither would have seen my younger child if I hadn't. They haven't been to the east coast in years. I also hope to take the kids maybe this summer to see DH's grandmothers but we'll see. This might be our only opportunity.

I hope everyone struggling with their parents has a peaceful night. I am very grateful that my family is doing well and I realize how fortunate I am. Life is so quick.

It's weird. I find myself really looking at my pennies and wondering how much we'll be spending this month. I don't think we're on a budget but rather a strict diet. The less we spend the better. Like the less we eat the more we lose weight. I don't know how this will change us for the long term.

When we are back to earning an income will we go back to eating out more, traveling, etc? Will we just prioritize differently? Will we spend freely?

I didn't realize how much we spent freely before. We were conscious about not eating out too much and we don't window shop. But it's been many, many years since we've really watched grocery ads and bought only what was on sale.

I'm sure many people feel this way that we'd gotten to the point where I felt that since we were eating at home and cooking, I was "saving" money because we weren't eating out. So whatever I bought to prepare meats, seafood, vegetables, fruit, cheese no matter what the price it was less than eating out. And honestly it was. I mean the same pizza you eat out could be $5 a meal at home but $15 from Dominos. Or the one pound of shrimp for $8 would be $30 from a restaurant.

So I felt virtuous in not eating out but still spending freely at the grocery store. Now however I'm trying to curb our spending period. Not as much excess and I'm shopping ads and only buying what's on sale in the circular. I still won't menu plan but instead I look to create meals once again based on the cheapest things on the flyer.

How do you manage your grocery budget? Do you have any tips to save a lot of money? Our eating out budget has been reduced by about 75%. I'm not sure yet about our grocery but I wouldn't be surprised if it is about the same but feels tighter.

First we are doing better this month on groceries. We've spent $45 on alcohol so far and have enough beer to last the month, $57 on eating out/coffee shops, $242 on groceries and honestly we are good enough for the week. So I think we are on track to spend $150/week this month or around $600-750. I think spending around $150/week = $650/month which seems reasonable for a family of 4. Last month and even some of this month's costs are still us rebuilding our stockpile and necessities. Plus $650 for groceries and spending very little on eating out compared to previously I think is a huge savings. Last month spending around $1200 on groceries freaked me out a lot.

Second we are debating whether to do a Roth IRA this year. We have until April 15th to decide. We usually wait until January 30th anyway to see where our income lands. This year we may be able to do a roth IRA without doing a backdoor rollover Roth. We did manage to max out DH's 401k before he left his job. But it's $11k we'll be tying up instead of having in cash. My preference is once he's in his bootcamp in February we move the money if we think he's going to land a job asap. Or if I land a job sooner.

Third our utility bills are ridiculously cheaper. It's 20% of what we used to pay. A full month of electric and gas and we paid a combined $83 for the month! This is with a very inefficient furnace and refrigerator. I can't believe it. We did use 404 kwh of electric instead of our base usage of 900 kwh. In our last place our water heater was electric and we never changed it to natural gas because of the location it was impossible. Second we used 28 therms to heat the house where we are now and it $35. Insanity. We were on a budget billing for both electric and natural gas in our last place to help even out the winter costs and we were budgeting $250/month each. This is on top of our $250/month for HOA dues for water and insurance. $400 extra month for just utilities I had to admit really helps the budget. I can totally understand now how Mr Money Mustache talks about living frugally as a early retiree.

Anyway I had a great weekend and I'll post more later.

My mom came in Wednesday night for the weekend and left early this morning. She thought the duration of the trip perfect. She had a great time seeing our new place, the kids, and visiting a new city. I think she liked it but could never move away from Hawaii. Oh well.

First thought was she brought all of us and early Christmas present in the form of water pik water flossers. I believe she one she got runs $59.99 online and she brought us each one so 4 total. YIKES. When we were visiting last my kids love it and she bought it to promote good dental health. I admit to loving it already but I wonder if it's a good idea to obsess over one's dental health? We still floss 1-2x a day and brush 2-3x a day. I have very soft teeth and grind my teeth so I very easily have issues. But since becoming and adult I've been extremely conscious oral care and I once worked in a dental lab doing research on chewing gum for cleaning teeth. The amount of money and fun I had was amazing. But also terrifyingly disgusting. Anyway a couple of years ago my crown became absessed and I had to have the tooth removed and an implant done. This was after 15+ years of the root canal. So I admit I am very worried about my teeth. But does anyone else use a water pik? Has it made a difference? I love it but I worry my mom just wasted her money. FWIW she has been using one for about 5 years now and swear by it along with flossing and brushing. Dental hygiene is not cheap.

Second I called Ameriprise and because we have renter's insurance instead of home insurance we no longer qualify for the mult-policy discount. Ugh. Of course our rental insurance is cheaper than our home insurance but not by much. Also since we officially moved in August and all our policies renewed we were double billed so I'm waiting on refunds and I called to follow up on our refunds today since it's been 8 weeks and apparently no refunds were processed.

Third I'm a bit worried about our rental. My DH and DK1 are having terrible allergies. We thought maybe it's seasonal and outdoor. But with the weather and lack of pollen and not being outside we suspect it's our rental house. We have carpet everywhere and we think it wasn't really cleaned. And even if it was cleaned the pet (likely cat) dander is what is causing their allergies. It also could be a mold problem. We're not sure how to test for either. And for now they both are taking daily doses of allergy medicine. Plus this morning DK1 woke up on picture day at school with swollen eyes. Uuggh. I guess we'll do the reshoot. I wish we had considered the carpeting before we moved in.

Finally where do most people do oil changes? The cheapest place like a jiffy lube?

I got a box of Henna Hair dye from my neighbor to try out on my hair. It worked out great. I have to figure out how to post pictures again. Anyway while it's not cheap, $7/box it is really awesome. My hair does not feel dry or brittle. The color is amazing and I love the way my hair feels.

I used to dye and highlight my hair using groupon or just paying a long time ago. But it got to be pricey. I've tried box dyes but I think it looks to fake on my hair. Unfortunately with my dark hair the whites really stand out. But now it's more naturally colored and I love the red color.

Tips she gave me use lemon juice and you have to mix the henna overnight. Then let it sit at least 4-5 hours or longer on your hair. It is amazing. She does it every couple of months. She also told me to watch the videos. Anyway I thought I'd share for those who are interested.

http://www.hennasooq.com/fresh-jamila-henna-powder-2015/

We need massive reform in the country on both health care and gun control. I'm liberal and I don't deny it. But right now my DH and I are experiencing life as "poor" in this country. We are watching our pennies like we never before.

Never before have we been on the type of a high deductible health insurance. Never before have we ever been worried about going to the doctor. Never have we considered the cost of a dr visit. Never before have we wonder what will happen if we have to hit the deductible. Have we been priviledged? Absolutely. DH grew up with socialized healthcare. I grew up with a mom who worked for the state so primo for the US. The idea that we worry about visits for our kids now worries me. The fact we don't have prescription coverage worries me a lot. I've always supported single payer socialized health care and never more than now.

Look the truth is for a healthy family of 4 it's costing us $560/month for basic HDHP premium. That's with a $6500 individual/$13k family deductible. Until now DH and I have had jobs that has always provided health insurance. Great health insurance. In grad school DH had premium coverage no costs as did I. His job was superb, best of any industry but the premiums were skyrocketing as I've mentioned. But we've never been without or lived looking at deductibles. We are now. It's not a pretty feeling. It's not an easy situation to asses. I know we are blessed more than others because we can financially manage, but at the same time I am looking at part-time work solely to get group health insurance again.

What does that say about our health care system? USA is the WORST in health care for 1st world countries. We have cutting edge technologies but for what? Most people can't afford it or go broke trying to pay for it. BK are caused medical bills and I can easily understand how. So people who don't want a single payer system please explain why?

I will lay out I believe health care isn't something people "afford" it should just be something everyone should have. And just moving to a single payer would probably cover the costs of it because our system is so INEFFICIENT and expensive that it costs more than all other single payer systems in other countries. So the argument it'll cost more is moot. Americans spend more on health care for less care than other countries. So why are people against it?

Second if everyone against socialized healthcare doesn't believe in it, then I hope they aren't using medicare or plan to. We have single payer socialized medicine and turns out EVERYONE over 65 is on it, it's called medicare.

Turns out everyone in the military is on TriCARE. If it is so horrible then all these military people should be turned out and given cash and they should buy their own policies. Why don't they? Because it would cost even more than what it costs now. They probably couldn't afford to buy matching health insurance for what the military costs to run Tricare. And don't tell me not. If it wasn't needed and used, then the military would probably give people money to buy health insurance but they don't.

So let's ask the question if health care should be capitalistic then everyone 65 and over and military should BUY their own insurance. All capitalistic health care supporter should put their money where their mouth is and not use Medicare or Tricare. Prove it by giving up the safety net.

And I think gun control needs regulations. I think it goes hand in hand with reforming mental health issues. But other countries don't have so many mass murders that have stricter gun control. Why is that? Is it the health care? Is it the laws? Is it a combination? Can we keep have semi automatic and automatic weapons so easy to come by?

By the way I think the "democratic/liberal" congress people are as much in the pocket as conservative republicans in congress. Neither party has anybody with backbone instead they are too busy pocketing money to do anything. Probably because they are rich enough to afford protection and rich enough to afford private schools. After all Jeb Bush and Donald Trump didn't even give lip about the sorrow, rather "things happen." Yes it happens but does it have to keep happening? Of course call up your bodyguards and private planes while the rest of us go about living.

Okay so I'm not really political in life or online. I don't like the confrontation. I also realize it's hard to change people's minds including my own. But people on facebook or in real life who are verbal enough to voice their opinions are usually quite aggressive. I say this about liberal and conservatives people who are entrenched in their positions.

But something that really bothers me more is that both sides have trouble having an intellectual discourse. I admit I think it's more conservatives that use hate mongering and fear but liberals thumb their noses and say snobby rhetoric as well. But I don't how this country is degenerating so quickly that anyone of an opposing opinion is considered wrong and A$& and s#&)%*.

I also don't like the racism and hate going on. That Ben Carson can even say a muslim shouldn't be president and muslim faith isn't compatible with the constitution and get more donations. I'm seriously floored. A blogger calling Bernie Sanders a weasel Jew. I can't believe in today's day and age people can say these things and not be spurned.

I wonder when will a move forward as a society and start talking about our issues in a respectable manner?

Ugh....What can I say? I haven't looked at our investment accounts or retirement accounts until now. We'll we've lost about 10% in retirement down from 6/15/16 $575k to $520k. And we're not adding to it either this year anymore so it's a bit frustrating. Our taxable accounts are down $40k but part of that is from our investments going down $33k. $7k for a move, month long trip, deposits, and start up costs is not terrible. Of course our investments tanking is a sorry thing.

Unfortunately our burn rate needs to come down we're been spending way to much money on just getting set up again. How bad has it been? Well the utilities weren't bad this month we paid trash $52 until end of October, $59 for electric/gas, $99 to set up internet with comcast $50, downgraded our cell phones to $90/month from $130 and am waiting for the water bill. We spent $137 for the month on car gas.

So the food budget and pet budget are where we are bleeding money. We spent $203 on eating out, way too high I think. But I'm having trouble curbing my husband. He's not willing up a coffee from starbucks and wants it almost daily. Our groceries this month was $1122! OMG. Granted a lot of it was set up stuff like toilet paper, paper towels, diapers, shampoo, body wash, cleaning supplies, and basic kitchen stuff. We used up mostly everything and gave away stuff that would have been difficult to move. Also we had to buy a lot of stuff to start up the kitchen like a spice rack for $25 from costco. But honestly it was everything else that added up quickly. Canola, sesame, evoo, balsamic, red, cider, white vinegars, soy sauce, mirin, cooking wine, etc. A shopping trip to the ethnic markets we spent $100 on spices and other stuff. The cleaning supplies from costco was another $100. Moving is a lot more expensive out of town than probably people realize. I certainly didn't expect all these expenses.

Hope that we are able to curb our budget next month.

I realized I'm pretty bad at reading comments so I'll do a few updates.

We ALL are extremely happy to have moved. We love it here. Everything has been amazing. The house is perfect. The neighborhood is great. And we adore the weather, people, everything. I asked my DH today which city he's preferred where we've lived and he said hands down here. Something about it just strikes a chord within.

Did I mention we have a hammock in the backyard as a housewarming gift from an old neighbor? We swing it most days. The weather been great. We've had 2 sunday dinners with my nephew and a couple of friends. We've explored and enjoyed biking.

My DH plans on going back to work February 1st. He's enjoying the time off and relaxing. FWIW his old job people are on knife edge since the VP just got fired and potentially more people will be going next March. A lot of his old coworkers have called him to chat and ask about life and complain.

As for me? I've been trying to keep in touch with friends we've left behind but they haven't been very responsive. I can't help but wonder if we would have ended up drifting apart anyway this year? That people would have gotten busier and new friendships would have developed. But we are also making new friends here so perhaps it'll all work out.

Our only sad note is that our dog has lymphoma and we've started him on a modified chemotherapy. We refused surgery for his leg and chosen a less drastic chemotherapy than recommended. Having been through this once we are hoping for the best with the decision we've made. We've spent so far this month around $2k and more to come on his. I did cry in the office a little but I'm okay. I hope the kids understand. We'll need a little bit of time recover I think before we get another dog.

So I found a credit card today in the parking lot of the grocery store I was entering. I stuck it in my pocket and gave it to the cashier as I checked out.

I felt a lot of guilt because I wonder if the person who dropped it will get it back? Perhaps I should have talked to the manager? I mean I get tons of good karma with all the wallets returned to me when I lose them. So I am trying again to pass along good karma. I've returned a wallet before I found in a shopping kart to the customer service desk. But this was a smaller grocery store I don't think with a customer service so I just handed it over.

It was a bank of america card and I know I probably could have driven to a branch and given it to them. But I didn't feel like dealing with getting the kids in and out of the car.

Do you think I did enough? I am feeling really bad like I should have done more than say "Oh I found this in the parking lot."

I find it impressive and amazing people can follow a budget. I struggle with organizing receipts and honestly I hate breaking them down. I hate trying to group cleaning supplies, home furnishings, clothing, etc. I mean I can do very simple stuff like groceries and eating out and gas for the car. I also can do stuff like insurance or cable or water or electric.

But tracking all the spending? I'm not sure where to put categories and receipts sometimes. I only check my restaurant receipts against the charges to make sure the tip is put on correctly. And I keep receipts of things I might return or are high value with the item.

But how do you really track it? Is it better weekly? Or month? How do you budget stockpiling groceries or cleaning supplies?

What really worked for us and I'm still getting into the rhythm is picking a number and seeing where our budget will land. I'll pick a number and see if we can stay within and if need be I'll tighten it.

Rent $2400, Electric $200, Water $100, Internet $60, Cell Phone $95, Trash $30, Gas $200, Groceries $500, Eating out $200, Misc $100. Then see if we hit these targets and adjust.

But tips for budgeting will be appreciated.

It's interesting living a lifestyle eschewed by Mr Money Mustache. We're not "retired" but taking a break from working. We don't have enough to retire fully and live the lifestyle we want. We probably are close especially if we moved further out from where we are and lived very frugally. But the truth is my DH isn't willing to compromise and wants to work so we will continue on the hamster wheel. We just took a short break from "work" in the traditional sense.

It's been a month but a busy month for my DH and I. Since we moved cross country most of the month was spent unpacking, organizing, and just getting settled. For the most part we are close to being done and really getting settled into a routine.

I've noticed a couple of things. We curbed the eating out which is good since it's pricey. I miss it a little but we're trying to limit it to 1-2x a week. So far it's been 1x a week. Our cooking is getting back to where it used to be pre-kids. We have more time to put effort. Also we grocery shop more and look for sales and shop the circular because we're on a tighter budget. This month so far our grocery budget has been an excessive $700 but a lot of it has to do with buying stuff like spices, condiments, flour, sugar, canola oil, olive oil, etc. Things you need to start up your kitchen. Basic goods that all add up. It really was the first 2 weeks of moving in when we bought a ton of extra groceries and we don't have a stockpile either yet going. However we're also running lean and sort of buying enough for a week worth of cooking.

However we fill gas a lot less. So far this month we've spent $77 and haven't filled since the beginning of the month. We don't have cable just internet. The deal happened to be $50/month for 100 mbps and adding cable was an extra $20. Where we were cable was an extra $5/month because the "bundle" of local channels plus hbo was $84 versus $79 for just internet.

This lifestyle is pretty relaxing. I'm not sure if either of us could last long term but knowing we have 4 months of DH not "working" I think will go by quick. He went to a info session of his bootcamp and was told he has to get up to speed on Linear Algebra and Multivariable Calculus. So he's taking online classes to make sure he can ace it. So these 4 months should go by fast. He was also reassured that they had a 100% placement rate after the camp.

Guess it'll be interesting watching our savings dwindle and seeing what happens. We're starting off with $80k cash, $100k invested, and $350k for a house DP. I hope we don't tap any more than the $80k or at least that's our goal.

I finally got around to tallying our road trip spending. Previously I had mentioned our road trip costs for the hotel. It was not bad for 28 days of being in hotels/camping = $1832.70. Less than $100/day and less than our mortgage and utilities.

However we spent $2257.39 on eating out and groceries for the month. And absurd amount but then we were not shopping sales, and eating out many, many meals. It would have cost more to have gotten hotel rooms with kitchens since we stayed in the cheapest places.

We also spent $696.36 on activities while traveling. Things like Niagara Falls Aerocar and Maid of the Mist. We also took a ferry to Mackinac Island and boat tour of picture rock national lakefront. We also biked Mackinac island and tubed in Leavenworth WA. All in it was a great deal I think.

Finally we spent $646.32 in gas driving cross country. We put on around 5000 miles driving from east to west coast. I think that's a pretty good deal.

All in I guess we spent $5432.77 for a 28 day vacation. Not bad around the cost of our normal monthly budget to be honest. Except we had a cool adventure and lots of memories. Could we had done it more frugally? Yes. We could have camped more and probably eaten at cheaper restaurants the whole way. But overall it was a nice vacation. We cheaped out on how we camped and hotels to indulge a bit more on eating out.

But now that we've moved I'm interested in our new budget.

The lower cost of living is SWEET. I am loving the small benefits. Yes housing is at least 25% cheaper, probably closer to 30-40% to be honest when everything is said and done. It's hard to compare because the houses are newer and need less work so where we lived a $800k home was a "fixer" that is about the same size or bigger, but needing new furnace, roof, insulation, lead paint, windows, electrical etc. I mean that this year 2 of my friends bought homes they couldn't move into without getting the electrical upgraded from Nob 2. That was $15k OOP before they moved in, besides it was a safety hazard. Both people also had to tear out bathrooms that had leaks and were rotting and are working on those projects. So though I think house are at least 25% cheaper I think it's much more.

But I can definitely see a difference in utilities however with our first electric bills. Here it is 9.5 cent/kwh, we last paid 24.8 cents/kwh where we lived. Ridiculous. If we used the same amount 921 kwh we should have paid $87.49. Instead we paid $228.40. So around 1/3 the price we paid.

Our natural gas in our new location $1.03/therm used. In our last place we were paying $1.16/therm used and this was summertime. The price in Dec/January was $1.40/therm. Being the frugal folk we only used 307 therms in the winter. So our bill was $430. Our connected neighbors who heated to 70 instead of our 60 was $1200.

Another direct comparison was our property taxes. The property tax rate of our town was $12.12/$1000 of assessed value. Here the assessed tax rate is $10.73/$1000 of assessed value. This is 12% saving on property taxes and that's direct comparison of assessed value.

I'm waiting on our water bill but previously our water bill was $18 per CCF for combined water and sewer. I'm interested in the rate we will be paying. Of course we are also paying $30/month trash service.

Add this all up with a saving of state incomes and lower food costs and I think we could potentially be looking at a lower cost of living around a solid 20%. So a 20% paycut should be fine. The question is where we will land income wise?

I also know that where we moved is not a LCOLA. It's actually pretty expensive for the US comparatively. Perhaps others will chime in about their cost of living. Do you watch what you pay? Do you know what you pay? I know when we moved from CA to the East Coast we had comparable COL. But this is the first time we've ever lived somewhere cheaper for us both. It's pretty sweet.

We switched from Verizon to T Mobile. T Mobile is having a deal for 10 gb a line with unlimited talk and text $120 for up to 4 lines. We had three lines and a spare sim card given to us. So we decided to switch.

My BIL broke his phone and was happy to buy a new one. My DH and I ported over our old verizon phones and activated them on T mobile. T mobile also paid our early termination fees off the contract.

We were paying $190/month between three people for 3 smart phones and 10 gb of data shared. Now we are looking at $120 for 3 lines with 10 gb each. Of course my DH is interested in a new phone but me personally I'll be focusing on the cheapest smart phones since I seem to be a magnet for breaking/losing of phones. So there is NO point for me to have anything fancier than my most recent moto E for $70. Not a bad deal.

Of course my BIL just bought a note 6 and my DH will likely want something nicer soon enough. But personally this no contract and buy a phone you like I think is the best plan. I've been dying to move to cricket or pay as you go and it never made sense when I inputted how much data and minutes we've used. But this new T mobile deal is pretty sweet.

If only my parents also on T mobile would have joined our plan then 5 people for $130 would have been a steal. And no my mom refused because of control issues.

The neighborhood we live in is great. People seem less rushed and less stressed. The houses are very middle class and if I had to guess most people are solidly middle class.

But what struck me is a lot of the phrases I'm hearing. Before we lived in a very upper income, affluent area for the country. Average house price was $1M, condos were around $500k+, so you can imagine that the average salary I think was $100k. Where we lived that was scraping by.

Now the area we've moved to the houses are running around $400-500k and it's considered one of the more affluent areas of the city we live in. Honestly expensive compared to many other suburbs. Most people here are 1 or 2 working professionals like where we lived, and I'd guess the average income is also $80-100k.

But I've heard from a lot of people that they are on a tight budget, living paycheck to paycheck, and stretching it. I don't get it.

I know where we moved from people made a lot of money, but I also know there were MANY two income professional couples trying to keep up with the Joneses. But here people don't seem to be driving Audi, Lexus, BMW, Benz. They aren't sending their kids to tons of activities that cost exorbitant amounts or hiring nannies to pick up the kids and chauffer them.

But they are talking about leasing a new Rav4, not affording activities for kids, and being paycheck to paycheck. I am surprised. I thought that they are living so much more modestly they would be saving more. But it seems that no matter what the house price, income, or area, many people aren't saving and struggling.

I thought it was mostly those who tried to keep up with the Joneses at the highest levels of income that were in trouble. Now I think that at all income levels people are trying to keep up with the "joneses" of their level.

FWIW we fit in better in the neighborhood carwise and stuff. We don't seem so frugal. But I wonder if knowing we can afford more might not encourage us to spend more?

I really like where we live now and our neighbors are super nice people. Yesterday I had a very nice mom talking to me about going back to school and she said she was doing it because she wanted security for her kids.

She was in the restaurant/events planning business before and made good money. She would make around $80k she said being manager of restaurants or corporate event planning. But she gave that up after kids because the hours weren't condusive to having kids.

She loved what she did. Her husband is a head chef at a nice restaurant. She is going back to school to be an ultrasound tech but she's got 2 years of prerequisites but then 2 more years of the program. So at least 4-6 years she said. She wouldn't really be starting until her youngest was in kindergarten or 1st grade. She's in her 40s. She was debating is it worth going back to school?

She potentially thinks she could make $100k as an ultrasound technician. But she wonders is it worth doing all the schooling? Is it a wise investment? She thinks she'll get a lot of financial aid. So not much out of pocket.

But is the years of lost income worth it? I told her I'm not sure. But she should be sure she wants to be an ultrasound tech because worse case scenario is going back and not liking it. Then having wasted time and money.

What are people's thoughts on these sort of career changes?

So we've bought a few things for the house. For the most part we've had too much furniture in some ways than too little. But we've had to buy 2 shoe racks from bed bath and beyond for $16 each. They were regular $20 each with 20% off coupon. They are great the 6 shelf stacker that is made with fabric so you can hold kid shoes without it falling through like other shoe racks.

Two bookcases one for each child. We actually sold three bookcases but my DH wasn't comfortable with either in the kids rooms. They were full size and he thought they would climb it and fall over. He also doesn't put beds by windows because he thinks they'll crash and fall through the windows. It's weird phobias that I have to humor. But we bought one bookshelf on craigslist this weekend for $20 and one at ikea for $30. I figure depending on where we move we might sell them and buy the kids a matching set at that time when we get into a final home.

We also bought a dresser for the DK2 since she's got her own room now. We had a dresser previously that was falling apart and bought over 15 years ago from IKEA as is department. Again we went to IKEA and splurged $40!

Other random stuff we are buying a new rice cooker since ours broke. Actually a friend bought it for us as a housewarming gift. And possibly the 20 spice rack from costco. It comes with 5 years of free spice refills. We got rid of our spices and condiments because it wasn't worth shipping. Besides who knows how it would have survived the move. Again all these tiny costs add up.

I'm also waiting for a coupon from Groupon because I need a couple of duvet covers and extra sheet sets. Uggh. Moving is such a pain. Our house is a wreck. There is no space to clean and vacuum and yet I'm getting antsy because I know it's dirty, but we are living with boxes and stuff out everywhere.

So the dog injured the ligament in his knee of his back leg. Prognosis? Surgery is the only way to fix it. However it's not advised because it's a rough surgery for a dog his age. One option is a lesser surgery with fishing line however again his age and condition suggest he could die on the table.

Second we are waiting for the results of his biopsy and histopathology of his skin tag. It's likely that he has lymphoma. If that is the case, because of his age and condition surgery is extremely risky. We should find out the results either Friday or next week.

Right now we are in limbo. We are pretty sure that we won't do surgery. And we won't do chemotherapy but we will do some treatment. What this means who knows. Is cost an issue? Yes and no. The surgery could be $2k-3500. Chemotherapy probably around there. But more important is the quality of his life, ie recovering from surgery and spending 6-8 weeks crated might not be ideal. Also we are unsure we would want to risk surgery and him on the table. So there are many factors at play.

Yesterday alone cost us $600 for the services rendered. I find myself struggling more with the idea that we're out of options than worrying about the financials. I can see how people easily run up pet bills. I've never tallied our chemotherapy and end of life bills on our last bichon. I know it was over $7k at that time. We did get almost 8 more months with 6 of them good with him. And we were prepared when he passed instead of his initial collapse.

This time I'm not sure.

So our dog hasn't been well for a couple of months. He's had a leg/joint issue and we've suspected a lymph node issue. It's confirmed today when we sent him in for teeth cleaning and the dr suggested a lymph node biopsy. He's old at least 14 potentially more. We've had him since 2006 and it's a little depressing. Since we've lost our last guy in 2010 we've only had one dog.

I'm honestly a bit nervous. If this is it I'm not ready to get another dog. But with two kids I'm not sure how willing to wait they would be for us to grieve. The first time was hard enough but we had one dog left and our lives had just changed with a new baby. So the dog of our youth (20s) was ready to say goodbye.

I don't know how I feel that we've moved again to possibly say goodbye to another family member. I know that we've changed our lives again but we got this house a lot in part for him. And I don't know if I can picture life without a dog.

Cross your fingers. But either way I know based on his age we are just counting time. We realized it as this winter and he had a lot of trouble in the snow.

Okay so moving is costly. There are a lot of strange and unexpected expenses. You can easily predict movers, storage, boxes, hiring help, time off etc. You can even guess maybe replacing furniture.

But my weird expenses is the replacement of stuff that I used up or didn't move. Stuff like condiments like Ketchup, mustard, mayo, salad dressing. Knowing we were going to move we had not been stockpiling since last summer and was using up our pantry stockpile.

Also we used up our toilet paper, paper towels, laundry detergent, cleaning supplies before moving and gave away all half empty stuff. These are all things that needed to be replaced and I didn't have much time to stockpile since we need some of it sooner rather than later.

We did buy once piece of used furniture so far a TV Stand for $20. We also might sell an old desk so that negates buying furniture. We are trying to minimize buying and selling anything because we plan on moving and buying within a 1-2 years.

I will say that moving into our place makes me realize all the little things I want in our permanent place we buy. Little layout issues I never thought about in a condo. I will also admit a 3 bd 1800 sq ft house is a lot smaller in some ways than I thought. We're definitely wanting more space, something we'd probably never desire if we hadn't moved.

Still love my dyson cordless. But we moved into a house full of carpet. Ugh. Oh well it's a rental. But I'm not sure our cordless will do the whole house. So I'm considering $200 dyson DC 41 from Amazon or $210 canister DC 39 from overstock. Both are refurbished vacuums.

I hesitate to buy a canister but a lot of people swear by them. They say they are easier to use on stairs.

Do people have canister or upright vacuums? Which do you prefer and why?

A friend of mine was approved to adopt a little boy! Oh happy day! She already had a little girl same age as my oldest (hence we meet in class together) and now she is getting a little boy who turned 1 on my younger's birthday. HAHA.

It is truly an auspicious birthday and a blessed day. What a lovely birthday present for him and what a great day for her. Anyway today she was told she's going to pick him up on Tuesday.

OMG!!!! So exciting for her. She's a single mom now with two kids and had pretty much given up getting a second child. Blessed are they all!!! My thoughts and prayers are with them and what am amazing thing to happen.

Will we be saving money by moving? Can we compare apples to oranges? Have we saved? I think unequivocally yes. We just rented a single family house for $2400/month.

The house next to our rental sold on July 31st 2015 for $571k for a 4/2.5 bath in much nicer condition. Our rental was bought October 14, 2014 (less than a year for $445k). We bought our townhouse in 2005 for $575k so we are in the right price range without moving up cost. We also are moving up in size and amenities.

For people who are into real estate based on pure numbers not including maintenance costs over the years we averaged 2.8% appreciation over 10 years. I enjoyed not moving and having stability. But honestly we did better investing in the stock market.

Also for our rental I think our utility bills will be lower I suspect because the house is 2005 built versus 1880s. We were averaging $250/month balanced bill for heat/natural gas and $250/month electric all year. Our heating bills if we had not paid balanced billing was on the worst months $700-800/month. We also paid approximately $150/month per unit in our association for water and sewer. According to the property manager we should pay around $100/month water, $100/month electric/heat, and $30/trash.

Of course we won't have a tax break, nor will we be "saving" money by paying down equity. So that may negate the savings in utilities.

But I think since we've moved to a new area and are uncertain about it renting makes sense financially so we don't leap into a house and make a mistake. What if we don't like the commute? What if we don't like the schools or community? Yes renting is paying someone else's mortgage but you are also buying yourself the flexibility to research the real estate market. You are buying the flexibility to make a mistake on location without losing your shirt and moving.

So yes with two kids and in our 30s we are renting. A lot of our friends and colleagues have said why? Don't waste money. You are going to hate it. But honestly it makes sense.

Renting is a luxury because often times it's cheaper to buy. But renting buys you flexibility. You are buying opportunity (job, school, life changes). And truthfully you are buying not having the headache of repairing anything. I am honestly a little apprehensive at living in someone else's home. But then I think "oh well if anything breaks, it's THEIR problem". And if anything happens they fix it. I can't wait. I've done enough home repair in 3 months to last 3 years.

I am vacationing in Hawaii with my kids and relaxing and enjoying doing nothing. The road trip was awesome and fun and amazing. But it was tiring, exhausting, and stressful in it's own way. The last week of apartment hunting and learning our way around a new city was exciting but hard with two small children. Worrying about making the right decision but knowing it's a rental.

Also I'll admit it's a bit of a hard pill to suck knowing we are "renting". Easy to say and hard to do. Realizing that we hadn't rented in over decade. It's not just the money but answering to someone else!

Anyway though as I'm in Hawaii I'm enjoying my family and my mom keeps saying "oh I'm spending so much money with everyone visiting". You LAL, your brother, his family, etc. She says I'm retired on a fixed income. I point out her income with my dad's make them ineligible to contribute to a Roth IRA. And my parents still "contribute" to a backdoor roth at 84 and 62 years old! They draw on pensions, IRAs, SS, and investments, and make $200k/year and my mom is worrying about money.

They own two homes free and clear and she's worried about not having enough. She says the bills seem more than her monthly money coming in and she doesn't want to touch a penny of investments. I want to smack her. I want her to SPEND the money on herself and do whatever the HELL she wants. I keep telling her to spend, spend, spend. Enjoy it. Bathe in it. I don't know go on every wild and crazy trip or buy a Tesla or something ridiculous. But the idea of her spending her money I think she's going to die with it.

Yeah okay readers I know perhaps that's her pleasure but I don't want to inherit that much money. I would rather have had some cool story about my mom sky diving at 85 because she's spending her money.

I have a lot of my mom's financial personality I can't help it. My DH has his parents and they are the same way. We were raised to it and it's hard for us not to be this way. But my DH is pushing me along the route to stop worrying about money. He's talked about us not having income for a year. He's talked about us not saving anymore for retirement as aggressively. That perhaps it's time for us to cutback and relax the purse strings.

I'm starting to believe him. I think the purpose of money is to enjoy your life. Whether it be working or not. My DH pointed out in a recent conversation that we've saved and I've planned as though we are stopping work in 10 years. That he'll sit around and "retire" early like Mr Money Mustache. The truth? He doesn't want to. He doesn't want to stop working at 45 or even now. He likes to work and wants to keep doing it. Being able to say FU to a company is great, and he likes having that freedom. But he isn't ready to stop working.

So I guess I have to relax and start to stop worrying if we have enough. I have to stop and smell the roses. I think we'll have enough even scaling back by age 55. Beside if I don't I might miss a moment.

I am trying to convince my mom to not miss a moment either. Here is my perfect moment recently.



It really was great trip.