I feel like we have a lot of stuff. We don't have a huge house so it seems like we have more stuff than we really need because of it. I have friends who say "oh they don't have much stuff." But when I point out that having a 4000-5000 sq ft house you probably have more stuff than our 2000 sq foot house it's hard to argue. Mostly I argue this point with my mom, who has aforementioned 4000 sq ft house and 600 sq ft condo.
So there they are with two homes packed literally to the gills. Stuff is in every cloest, every cabinet, everywhere. There is no dealing with the amount of stuff. Patient saver got me thinking as she managed to get her hands on her mother's art. The sentimental value is astronomical. That being said will her own children value it the same? Or will they only focus on maybe 1 piece?
I was thinking about what it means to have all this stuff. My neighbor I walk with is an only child. Her dad passed 3 years ago and her mom is in a facility since January 2019. This year around September she went to her parent's home and rented a uhaul and drove to a storage facility everything she thought was important and valued. Everything else she left. The interesting part is she hasn't done anything in the past 2 years. Her mom moved into a facility with 4 suitcases 2 years ago and they "pretended" that she was just trying it out and my neighbor would take her back to clean her house. It never happened. I can't help but think that might be me. Avoiding the experience of actually cleaning the house but rather instead just waiting until the person passes even if they don't live in the house to go through things.
So here's an interesting tibit to chew on 8.5 years ago my grandmother moved out of her apartment and into my aunt's home because she couldn't live alone anymore. But my mom and aunts instead of cleaning the apartment and throwing stuff out literally packed everything in boxes and put it in my aunt's garage. They promised that one day they would go through it with her. 8.5 years later they haven't unpacked most of it. Instead she lives in a tiny with only a few things and everything that was SOO important to throw away they just shoved into a box and went on living.
I know that's what my neighbor has done as well. I wonder is that the fate of my parents things? For me probably not. By the time I have to deal with it, my dad will for sure be passed and my mom at 69 well I don't know. My dad is 90 and when he passes can she really deal with it? I doubt it. Will I do the same thing? I don't know.
But how do you actually get rid of all the stuff? And how do you let go enough to give things to people? I'd love a few of my grandmother's art pieces she made (at least 1) but no one wants to give anything up...it might be valuable. So instead it's hung onto.
Ideally i think it'd be nice if parents would ask kids before they are forced to deal with it. What to do?