<< Back to all Blogs
Login or Create your own free blog
Layout:
Home > Archive: August, 2017
 

Archive for August, 2017

What will you do?

August 8th, 2017 at 11:58 pm

DH and I were chit chatting in the car, seems like we always talk in the car. Probably because the kids are strapped in and can't distract us as much as in the house fighting. Maybe because we're trapped in two seats and not focused on our cell phones, cleaning, work, dealing with kids, cooking.

Anyway I asked him in 5 years at 45 or so would he retire if he could? I was running numbers and it's highly possible if not sooner. We could potentially do it now if we were willing to cut our lifestyle. But seriously 45 is not improbable.

His answer? "And do what? Why would I want to?" I said "follow your zen". His answer "I'm following my zen now. I spent a year finding my zen, moving with you, and finding my dream job. I don't need zen. I really like what I do. If I stop liking it I'll tell you again and we'll talk. Until then I'll work and be content."

I sat there stunned. Here i am on a savingadvice forum/blog, I read early retirement forums and blogs, and I'm not married to a spendthrift. I married a guy who wants to work.

He further goes on to say "LAL your dad is still working at 86! My dad is still consulting at 66. I am not sitting here at 45 doing nothing." I said "do something you like." DH "I am doing something I love. Who else plays video games pretty much all day everyday? Who gets to be a gamer and paid for it? If I had told 10 year old Mr LAL your job will be video games I'd have died laughing and kissed the ground." LAL says "okay when it stops being fun, quit." DH "okay deal."

So back to the drawing board. Seriously I don't know when or how I'll be dragging him away from work. We're about to embark tomorrow on a 3 week vacation, I'll try to post pictures but I won't have a computer just my phone so we'll see. First trip for DH in a year and he's not even sweating it. I'm dragging him away since he hates traveling. He'd rather stay at home and do nothing. Hence retirement is not his cup of tea in that sense. He doesn't want to travel and see the world.

Have you actually planned your retirement? And thought about what you would do?

Count your blessings

August 3rd, 2017 at 05:17 pm

A lot of friends recently keep complaining about their lives. Some really are in a difficult situation. But others I keep telling them to count their blessings.

Some blessings are financial. Some blessings are just life. I can't explain but I feel like often times we take for granted everything we have and don't appreciate even the smallest things.

A friend complained about not having enough money and being on a budget. I said at least you have enough to choose how to spend your money. Be happy that you can make choices.

Another friend is getting divorced. She began crying about how she's giving her children a terrible life and she's ruined their lives. That they have less than they used to. I told her to stop right there before we couldn't be friends. If she truly believes that having a single parent is a lesser life we couldn't talk anymore.

I love my mom and kiss the ground she walks on everyday for the life she gave me. I appreciate the fact I was raised with good values and morals. That she worked hard and no matter what she gave me the best life she could and I believe truly succeeded even without money. I feel my mom sacrificed so much and I understand and appreciate everything she did. And my friend needs to get over it. Yes divorce and single parenting is hard. But it's not a lesser life.

Another friend was complaining about how hard it is to pay off debt. I said appreciate that you are paying down debt. It would be worse to keep digging the hole deeper. Every dollar is another you don't owe. Yes it sucks and is slow but it's better than staying in debt. Look at the cup half full.

Another friend is panicking about buying a house. I said it'll happen. Everything happens for a reason. That have some faith.

Finally another friend we passed boxes onto, her husband quit his job and they aren't sure what they are doing except moving. I told her follow where they feel lead and it will unfold. That sometimes you are doing what you are meant to do. I really believe that.

All these people have a lot to be thankful for but to only focus on the negative is harder than realizing all the positives.

Sometimes I get stuck in that place but I slap my face and tell myself I have so much to be thankful for snap out of it. I have to always look at my awesome kids and husband, the health of our family, the lovely home, the nice weather, and that we are happy. I could easily write all the negative things happening like I haven't found a school for my DK2. I haven't settled on a contractor, when 3 haven't gotten back to me arrgh! I am spending an exorbitant amount of money right now. But instead I have to keep positive. I have a lot to be thankful for.

Are you a half empty or half full kind of person? Is it easier to complain or appreciate?