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I'm getting an ulcer

February 7th, 2017 at 01:42 pm

I'm getting an ulcer I swear it. I feel my anxiety getting worse as we look for a house. The market has slim pickings and I'm worried we should just move into another rental. My DH says not to worry that we should let this season play out and see what happens. The kids asked for a dog but I said not until we buy a house. I am still missing not having one but I feel like this is something that needs to wait until we settle down. Finding this rental with a dog was hard. Doing it again? I think would stress me out.

We also had some issues with the mortgage. The year of no income hurt us and we had to explain it. Due to this we also qualified for less money because of it. We aren't so happy about having to potentially put more money down on the house. I'm stressed because our realtor wants us to work with her guy so she can say we're qualified with a reputable broker she knows instead of us getting the best deal. This makes me leery and upset.

I know I shouldn't stress out. But I can't help it. I don't know if we should shelve buying a house another 1-2 years. We can move into another rental and save money. I mean also I worry because if they take away the mortgage deduction on taxes I think it'll impact home prices. It certainly influences our decision. We'd spend less significantly and I think we might choose to pay cash. I can't imagine that others in our bracket might not be forced as well to spend less.

Also DH will have 2 years of income if we wait which since they aren't counting his entire income right now might make a difference. Strangely if he had been working his last job we'd qualify for more than we do now even though we make more money now.

I am also embarrassed IRL to talk about our 1st world problems. So it's only here I can really express how I feel.

Plus our DK1 is being tested again. She's got an anxiety disorder. Big surprise. Trust me with her behavior we've had multiple tests for autism or spectrum and that's not it. Nor is it sensory processing. It really is an anxiety disorder that has come on early. And yes I feel guilty and more anxious because I worry about her. So I'm not sleeping well and I have TMJ even with my night guard. My mom is anxious and on medications. I only used them pregnancy/PPD, but I do wonder if I shouldn't get back on them.

Anyway maybe everything will work out. Let's see what happens by May.

7 Responses to “I'm getting an ulcer”

  1. ThriftoRama Says:

    Ugh. House hunting is pretty overwhelming. Five years ago, it was us. In the midst of the Great Recession and all the mortgage mess, too. I almost gave up a few times, but we kept at it and now we have our house and it was a great move.

    I agree about the dog. It complicates thing. It's better to wait.

  2. My English Castle Says:

    I agree with Thrift about the dog. And it's hard to force a house. I honestly think it's like romance--the right one comes along and you shouldn't settle. You'll know it.

    Anything you can do to help you relax? Yoga/ Book? Exercise?

  3. CB in the City Says:

    I agree. You can't force a house. The right one will show up; it just might not be on your schedule. Try not to stress too much.

  4. fern Says:

    I'm sorry it's causing you so much stress. It can be a fun experience. Maybe you should wait, then, so maybe you'll be more mentally prepared next year.

    Just say NO to your realtor about their mortgage broker. That would irk me too. I think if you tell her in no uncertain terms, firmly but kindly, she'll back off as she won't want to offend her customers.

  5. rob62521 Says:

    Don't force yourself to accept just any house. Sometimes it is better to wait and try to be patient. And take care of yourself. As far as your realtor trying to push her broker, I'd say hold off. You need to look out for yourself. The realtor is apparently looking out for herself.

    I'd wait on the dog. Maybe you and the family can volunteer at a shelter or something like that to get your dog fix.

  6. livingalmostlarge Says:

    We've watched a friend's dog overnight. I am shopping for mortgages without talking to realtor so we are prepared. I'm probably just lonely without a organic vaccuum cleaner. Sweeping the floor is so weird.

    Anyway I saw a house today that didn't work and another passed on by the inspection report. After we leave for vacation in a couple of weeks maybe it'll all be better.

  7. FrugalTexan75 Says:

    I've only done house hunting once - and oh boy was it stressful. I definitely agree to wait on the dog.

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