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i hate house hunting

October 11th, 2016 at 09:36 pm

I am already tired of looking for a home and I've only just started. It's been exhausting and I think the real problem is that my DH and I agreed I would give homes the first run and then only show him the homes that past the muster. I have found a lot of homes with a some sort of problem. I will admit that I've managed to narrow down what I want in the house.

Location is key. We want a 30-45 minute commute for DH in a good school district. He had 2x last week of 2 hour commutes. There were accidents and the bus just got stuck and he was in at work around 10 am after leaving at 8 am. He also had a couple of 95-100 minute return commutes home when it should be between 75-90 minutes typically. This has made him exhausted. He can't work on the shuttle because he is easily motion sick so he only sleeps or listens to podcasts/audio books. But the truth is it's tiring even just adding those extra hours to his day. He's ready to buy the first house we can because of it.

We also have made a list and managed to define needs versus wants. We need 3 bedrooms but want 4 for guests. We need 2 car attached garage but want 3. We need a yard but want at least 1/4 acre but will likely compromise. We need a den, but want a den and bonus/playroom. We need the bedrooms together. We'd settle for a 4 bedroom and bonus if we could use the guest bedroom for a den/4th bedroom. Of course everything is negotiable based on price and location.

One of the problems? Is I feel like realtors are just trying to sell us any house and don't really care. I've gone out a couple of weekends and two different brokers on two different days in two different areas basically said "hey put in an offer." Nevermind neither house was exactly right, they both felt we should jump on it and just go in with an offer. I feel like both realtors feel like "hey let's get rid of these people with homes."

These were the full service brokers. I've found I prefer using redfin to tour homes not full commission based realtors because the full service realtors give me their opinion as to why a house is great. They don't point out the negatives. Instead they are basically just trying to sell me on every home. I wish they would shut up. Hence touring with the redfin is a lot more relaxing and calm. They are based on tours and I can see what I want and make my own notes and take in the house.

I feel also the full commission realtors don't want to bring me back. With redfin I feel as though I can go back more than once to see a house. I learned from a friend you should go see a house more than once because this is a big purchase. Don't rush and make a snap decision. I need to see a home at least 3x I feel. 1 by myself, 1 with DH, then again with DH at a different time of day.

This is the biggest purchase we'll make and I feel as though they want us to see it for 20 minutes and bam put down money. At least with redfin I don't feel that sort of touring pressure.

I will say that I think the full service realtors are better at figuring out negotiations and pricing. The ones on redfin are honestly BAD. They have no idea how to do comps and really price out an offer.

But right now I've told DH if a house falls in our lap we'll buy it. I've gotten a feel for what he likes. I think that we are going to wait and if we can't find a house we really like then we will settle in March/April. But until then I think we should keep looking until we find a home that hits all the boxes and works out for us.

8 Responses to “i hate house hunting”

  1. Petunia 100 Says:

    Definitely don't settle. There will be many more homes on the market in the spring.

    I know moving is a pain, but maybe moving into a rental closer to work in the meantime is an idea worth exploring.

  2. debt-free by thir-ty Says:

    My in-laws saw 32 houses before they found theirs. My mother-in-law said the moment she walked in, she knew it was the house. We got lucky and found ours on the first try. It kind of concerns me that we only saw 2, but we saw it twice before putting in an offer (once by ourselves and once with DH's parents) and did a nighttime drive-by. We move in in November.

    Good luck with the house hunt and hope you are able to find something that meets your needs and several wants!

  3. ceejay74 Says:

    I love house hunting but then again my realtor never pressured us and she brought us back as much as we wanted. She wasn't a very aggressive advocate during the negotiation process, so I hate that part but love the looking part.

  4. PatientSaver Says:

    It sounds like you're having more than one realtor show you houses. Why is that? If you have one realtor, a buyer's agent, representing you, I don't think they'll be trying to sell you on any one home, and if they're professional (big if) they realize it may take time.

    I looked every weekend for 6 months. My realtor was very patient. However, the house I wound up buying was one that I found in the MLS book that for some reason, he had skipped over and not shown me. As soon as I saw the outside, i got excited, and when i saw the inside i knew this was the house.

    But you're absolutely right. This is the biggest purchase you'll ever make and I think you're smart to want to see it several times. Anyone who doesn't is kind of crazy, IMO.

  5. rob62521 Says:

    I'm sorry you feel your realtors are trying to get you to settle. Glad you aren't willing to. You and your family are the ones who have to live with whatever home you buy. I'm so tired of greed especially from realtors. We had a pastor who relocated a number of years ago and the realtor who sold the house to them basically took them to the cleaners. They were used to living in a large metro area where houses were far more expensive. She let them think they were getting a great deal although the house was in great need of repair and hugely overpriced. Needless to say, after living there for a year or so, they realized the church member who was the realtor basically was in it to make her commission. This was way before the housing problems of 2008.

  6. LuckyRobin Says:

    A lot of it is because of your area. They are used to people snapping up anything and everything, sometimes sight unseen, because if they don't it might not be there tomorrow, not people who are careful and deliberate. You need to interview some realtors and find one that suits you and is willing to do what you want the way you want to do it.

  7. LivingAlmostLarge Says:

    Petunia, we don't want to move our DK1 again and again. Plus with a dog it's impossible to find a rental.

    Debtfree I've seen over 32 houses. I'm probably at over 100. I look at anything with potential.

    ceejay I think it's because i'm seeing everything that comes on just in case.

    PS I have a different realtor for different towns. They have no idea outside their selling area and I've found that when you use one unfamiliar they have no idea about schools, traffic, etc. Oh the friend who recently bought saw it once on an open house and then made an offer.

    Rob, ouch. I am so sorry that happened to the pastor.

    Luckyrobin it probably is. I find I like a low key, low pressure agent who knows they'll get a commission. I also don't like getting pressured into a deal. I've met so far in the area at least 5 families who feel they overpaid and got into bidding wars and are unhappy with their homes. I don't want to have big regrets over a lot of money.

  8. LuckyRobin Says:

    Too bad you aren't looking here. I could give you a name then.

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